Stage Fright

Hello Peeps!
The picture is linked to a helpful website I found. 

I want to talk about something serious.  It's been bothering me a lot lately.  In school the teachers either make you or you have the choice to go up and talk in front of many people that you may or may not know.  I have the biggest fear of going up in front of a crowd.  I had to do this today (5/2/14). 

It was a regular day of school until after school came when I had to go up and do a poetry slam.  The poetry slam is in honor of the month of April because April is National Poetry Month.  I don't know why the month of April was picked for this but it is.  Some of the people at my school were there, my school is about 2,000 students, and only 40-50 students went to the poetry slam.  I have always hated talking in front of crowds since I was in 4th grade.  4th, 5th, 6th, and 7th, and maybe 8th grade I had to present something to a class which is usually 20-30 students per class. 

I was the first one to go and as I was walking up there, I was shaking.  I got up there and I looked up and saw a lot of faces I knew and didn't know.  That made me nervous.  I looked back down at my paper.  I was thinking about how nervous I was, my job, and lots of emotions.  I choked on nothing in my mouth but my own voice.  I looked back up one more time and the next minute I was running out so scared out of my mind.  I'm crying because I just want to leave and go to work.  My teacher followed me down the stairs and was so proud of me.  I don't know why or how or what made her proud of me.  I didn't even speak.  I had a lot on my mind and wasn't ready for something like that. 

I am happy to have a place to put all of my thoughts and people that like my blog.  Maybe one day I will be able to talk in front of a group of people and won't be as scared as I was today.  Happy to tell you how I was feeling today. 

I am going to tell my poem.  If you copy right this you will be doomed!! This took a lot of time to come up with.  Its a long one. 

The title is: Eyes Are My Way Of Hearing

I’m not listening to footsteps in the

night when mom comes into check on me

 

I’m not listening to an alarm clock

It wouldn’t wake me up anyways

 

I’m not listening to a hair dryer

maybe that’s a blessing

 

I’m not listening to eggs frying

while my dad flips them for breakfast

 

I’m not listening to coffee perking

when I’m leaving for

school in the morning

 

I’m not listening to a flag in the wind

as we stand to recite the Pledge of Allegiance

 

I’m not listening to the sounds

of “S, F, SH, CH, TH” when people are

talking to me--

Sad, but true

 

I’m not listening to fingers on a

keyboard at a school presentation

 

I’m not listening to bubble gum popping as

I pass a piece to my friend in class

 

I’m not listening to turning pages

as I read my book for English

 

I’m not listening to people whispering

during lunch and telling their secrets

-especially the girls

 

I’m not listening to a pin drop during

Home and Careers when I made a chef’s hat

 

I’m not listening to soda fizzing when

I pour myself a glass after school

 

I’m not listening to people gulping

down their water after a strenuous workout at zumba

 

I’m not listening to babies crying

when they’re tried and

ready for a nap

 

I’m not listening to whistling anytime,

anywhere, any place

 

I’m not listening to new hybrid cars

when I’m walking in the middle of the road

minding my own business

 

I’m not listening to soft music

when I’m in a car cruising home from

work at the YMCA

 

I’m not listening to a conversation on

the phone EVER--

My ears won’t allow it

 

I’m not listening to biting into an apple so

crisp and red and juicy

 

I’m not listening to a rocking chair

when I sit on it

 

I’m not listening to the faucet drip

when I am in the other room

 

I’m not listening to my cat scratching

the furniture when I am not watching him

 

I’m not listening to leafs falling

besides me when I am

shuffling along a path in the

cool evening

 

I’m not listening to birds chirping

when I’m out racking leaves in the fall

 

I’m not listening to jingle bells

during a Christmas song

 

I’m not listening to a babbling brook

when I watch the water

tumbling over pebbles

 

I’m not listening to bees buzzing

in the summer as they move

flower to flower collecting nectar

 

I’m not listening to the summer breeze

when I’m on the beach on a

hot, sunny day

 

I’m not listening to summer rain

when I’m out on my front porch watching

the down pour

 

Instead I’m listening with my eyes and that works for me

If you're the same way when you go up and talk in front of a crowd, please share your experiences with all of us, I won't judge, and no one better be judgmental; we are all friends here. 

~*Nerdy, Unique talks*~